Toei has torn reality asunder

Now I know this isn't exactly breaking news, but Toei has recently launched the website for its latest project, a horrible amalgamation of super robots and moe.

For those unaware of this travesty, its called Toei Robot Girls, and is exactly what it sounds like; the many classic (and not so classic) super robots under Toei are now being turned into underage moeblobs.

Currently, three horrible Frankenstenien hellspawns have been unveiled;

Gai-Chan
Easily the most recognizable of the trio, Gai-Chan is based off Gaiking, who debuted in 1976 and saw a remake anime in 2005. She appears to be the leader of the group, given how she's probably the only one who someone under 30 would recognize.

Gacky
Based off 1976's Magnerobo Ga-Keen, she seems to be Gai-Chan's sidekick, or something. I dunno.

Bara-Tan
The moe anthropomorphism of the ludicrously ugly Baratack, Bara-Tan seems to kinda just stand around and look cute.

Never in my life have my very perception of reality, which was once so comforting and secure, been so utterly dismantled that all that is left are the crumbled remnants of a now forgotten facade, leaving me alone, cold and afraid.

Never before have I been wrecked to the very fiber of my being by a perversion so wretched, that it defies the very laws of physics; the union between manly super robots, my greatest love, and shitty moe, my wretched enemy.

Readers, friends, all, know this; I, Snark, no longer know what to think or what to believe. For the first time in my life, I have opened my eyes. And all I see is a vast darkness before me.

My perceptions of life, existence and the universe have been fundamentally altered. Every fact that I thought I knew must now be discarded. The very paradigm of life must be written anew. Now, as I stand at the crossroads of the universe, there is but one thing I know for sure; if these girls have the same attacks as their super robot counterparts, then Gai-chan's Face Open will be terrifying.