Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Toei has torn reality asunder

Now I know this isn't exactly breaking news, but Toei has recently launched the website for its latest project, a horrible amalgamation of super robots and moe.

For those unaware of this travesty, its called Toei Robot Girls, and is exactly what it sounds like; the many classic (and not so classic) super robots under Toei are now being turned into underage moeblobs.

Currently, three horrible Frankenstenien hellspawns have been unveiled;

Easily the most recognizable of the trio, Gai-Chan is based off Gaiking, who debuted in 1976 and saw a remake anime in 2005. She appears to be the leader of the group, given how she's probably the only one who someone under 30 would recognize.

Based off 1976's Magnerobo Ga-Keen, she seems to be Gai-Chan's sidekick, or something. I dunno.

The moe anthropomorphism of the ludicrously ugly Baratack, Bara-Tan seems to kinda just stand around and look cute.

Never in my life have my very perception of reality, which was once so comforting and secure, been so utterly dismantled that all that is left are the crumbled remnants of a now forgotten facade, leaving me alone, cold and afraid.

Never before have I been wrecked to the very fiber of my being by a perversion so wretched, that it defies the very laws of physics; the union between manly super robots, my greatest love, and shitty moe, my wretched enemy.

Readers, friends, all, know this; I, Snark, no longer know what to think or what to believe. For the first time in my life, I have opened my eyes. And all I see is a vast darkness before me.

My perceptions of life, existence and the universe have been fundamentally altered. Every fact that I thought I knew must now be discarded. The very paradigm of life must be written anew. Now, as I stand at the crossroads of the universe, there is but one thing I know for sure; if these girls have the same attacks as their super robot counterparts, then Gai-chan's Face Open will be terrifying.


  1. I still have my Kamen Rider, I will survive...

  2. Holy crap o.o
    I, on the other hand, am sort of excited about this, sorry dood >.>
    I like super robots. I lurv moe. I'm the standard, no complaints otaku.

    Though yea, face open will make me shit my pants.
    Oh, and the 2ch collective and various chinese imageboards turned my reality inside out ages ago :DD

    I've always wondered, with your bitter hate of moe, how do you stand anime nowadays, let alone like it?

    Guess I should shut up and not mention all the Rider-musumes out there then >.>

  3. making super robots moe is the cool thing nowadays. I can't wait to see the moe version of Getter Robo and Ideon

  4. I laughed.

    BTW, cute comic, and I think Gacky is actually cute :) Cuuuuute.

    But more in a tom-boy sense. She reminds me of Mai from Mai-HiME. One of my favourite gals, who isn't really a blob.

    But yeah, I'm with Dan. Just think of Strike Witches, who are basically fighter jets moe-fied.

  5. @Ningyo, I have seen some of the fan made art of Rider-musumes but I don't expect to see live action of moeblob Kamen Rider in my life time.

    Put all that aside, the letter was kinda cute ;3

  6. MWUAHAHAHAHA!!! THIS IS MAD HERESY!! Looks like Commisar Fuklaw has more spawns to kill >=]

  7. Moe is now devouring every genre....

  8. eh... not that interested...

  9. omg mecha powerpuff girls! doubt I'll be checking this out, but who knows. I'm sure there will be many more shows like this to defile your very fabric of life with the way the industry has been heading the last few years.

  10. Moe gets a step closer to world domination!

    Trying not to think of Face Open now.. Lol..

  11. it is the time to embrace real robots, maybe start from the "in-between" types like Overman King Gainer

  12. Oh man, I heard about this stuff, but damn that comic just cracked me up XD

    You know if you think it, it will happen xP

  13. Here's a mecha musume to your liking me thinks (and no I'm not trolling D: )

    Wish I knew who the artist was though D:

  14. I guess why you consider her as your good friend because you feel better about Yourself when you are around her right? :P
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