Saturday, October 3, 2009

On the Dread Tendrils of Moe - The Great Moe Conspiracy



Ladies, gentlemen, friends, comrades all. It saddens me to be the bearer of grave news; several months after Taikutsu Remedy bravely declared war on moe, we have made little to no progress in this, the greatest battle for our survival.

The Dark Forces of Moe continue to encroach upon our lands. From our lonely battlements, the sun seems ever fainter. Soon, the Darkness of Moe shall envelop all. Yet, at our darkest hour, we have chanced upon a glimmer of hope.

Like a candle in the dark, it's light is small and fragile, yet even the tiniest flame can banish the darkness. My friends, we have uncovered the plans of our enemies; the Dread Forces of Moe.

We have long known that they sought to envelop and bind us in chains of moe bondage. But now, we know their battle plan; they seek to tear down the men of the world, so that we will be too weak to stand against their evil.

In a previous post of mine, I mentioned my love of Queen's Blade. To which Meimi replied;

"Of course you endorse it, why in gods name wouldn't you?! You're a guy!"

In response, I lamented that whilst I liked Queen's Blade, many men did not, despite the fact that it was practically tailored for a male audience. In fact, most man I talked to professed a preference for moe shows like K-On! and Saki over Queen's Blade.

It was then that I realized, this was the very evil of Moe made manifest!

For years, the Dread Tendrils of Moe have been hard at work, changing man. Brainwashing him. Where once the proud men of the human race would gladly flock to an anime about naked women fighting each other, they now instead focus their attention on underage girls acting cute and playing music.

The time of Man is gone. Now is the age of the pedophile.

And this, dear friends, is the Wretched Legacy of Moe.

We must rebuild my friends! Remember the Golden Age! Where anime did not sexualize little girls, but instead entranced viewers with the bouncing tits of busty, adult women! Remember the times where men were men, and women were also men!

My friends, we now know that moe seeks to destroy our very concept of manhood, and replace it with a false idol of its own design. And for too long have we played into their hands. But we shall do so no more! We must destroy the agents of moe! And upon their ashes shall we rebuild our Alter of Manliness.

Long live Queen's Blade!

Long live non-pedophilia!

Long live the Age of Man!

We.

Shall.

Rebuild.

(As an aside, I've got a new poll up on the top right. Feel free to vote)

25 comments:

  1. Once again, I feel grateful that I don't have a dick. Clearly this war is not meant to be fought by women.

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  2. As for the poll: I can't pick only one. You should have 'all of the above' option!

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  3. You should consider still being alive after declaring war on moe to be success.

    I'm going to make a serious point, please treat it seriously: I think the thing is that we grow to love anime and moe when we are younger. As I professed my like of Anna Popplewell (Susan in the Narnia movies), I told my friends who said it may have been a bit creepy, that unlike them, I was only 3 years (and 2.5 weeks ;) ) her senior.

    The thing is, our tastes don't really change that much as we grow up, certainly not between 19 and 24, say.
    So we grow up liking thing X, and at a certain point, it becomes shameful to admit liking it, for then we'd be considered perverts.

    We like moe because we grew to like it when it was "acceptable". Same as with cartoons in the western culture before the mass invasion of anime, those who watched cartoons as older people are usually those who liked it as children, and didn't agree that it became wrong to keep on liking it just because they turned some chronological landmark.

    Note, I'm talking about moe aesthetics, and the "Cute!", because we go "Cute!" over new nieces, nephews and pets. The mentality of the younger girls grows ever more grating. But I don't think it's because I become ever so mature as much as it was always annoying, and my Limit Break of tolerance is filling up. Besides, as said, it's not like they can give me much anymore :P

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  4. @Guy: Truth. And I still watch cartoons and derive pleasure from it.

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  5. Here's a less serious question: So, which is a greater enemy to anime, moe or philosophy? :P

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  6. >Queen's Blade doesn't sexualize little girls

    lol

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  7. - Long live Queen's Blade

    -> Then you're not supporting moe, and supporting massive fanser- never mind.

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  8. I have no problems with moe or loli. On the other hand, I cannot stand larger than life unrealistic breasts.
    Also, similarly, I prefer bishounen and beautiful, almost androgynous men to manly muscle packed guys.

    Have I been completely defeated by moe?

    For the poll, I'm assuming Girl it up! is the Fruits Basket review, which I voted for. ^ ^

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  9. manwich would be good if you are vitaminless.

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  10. Queen's Blade is unpopular? Funny, I could've sworn I wrote a post endorsing it. This can't be right. I shouldn't have to write another post to set the record straight. But I will anyway.

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  11. Love that Manwich Motivational lol. Or is a demotivational? I can't tell...

    As for moe. If all guys continue to like moe.... well I'm screwed... as I'm pretty damn far from moe... and loli for that matter.... If anything I'm more tsundere than moe, if people say nice things bout me, odds are, if they're male, I'll sock em one. Though not actually, just a prod or light thump in reality. Though when I was younger I was quite violent. Thats right, I was a tsundere loli when I was younger! Loli no more lol.

    And as for a war on moe...I'd much rather watch shows like K-On! or Saki, probably cos I'm a girl and I dont wanna see stuff like Queens Blade...its bad enough I sat through the first episode twice.... once to see what it was like, and the second to show a guy that this kind of thing existed lol. He liked it. (See Snark, other guys who like Queens Blade and not moe exist lol He didnt much like Kannagi or Haruhi. Mainly cos he didnt like Haruhi, said she was mean, which she is really. And Nagi's pretty tsundere too sometimes... he must not like tsundere girls lol. He does have a very submissive girlfriend... or at least she's submissive to him when she's around our group of friends. Ofc she might be a total hellcat when they're alone. I know she didn't like me sleeping over his for anime/gaming/tv/movie marathons. I love that she's jealous lol. She has no reason to be, she's adorable, if I liked girls I'd be all over her haha. Reminds me of Kate from LOST actually...

    (And I went on a bit again...)

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  12. LMFAO - that was a riot. Only thing missing was you on a stage with a screaming banner behind you.

    LOVE LIVE THE QUEEN!

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  13. Snark.
    This. Post. was.
    GLORIOUS

    That's an interesting perspective to look at how we've grown to accept moe. Though personally when I began to be interested in it it wasn't exactly the hottest social norm at the time.
    Ah yes, the time when men were men, and women were also men... Daikon... Golden animation...

    -wait just a minute though, aren't women technically still also men in the interwebs? a la MMORPGs?

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  14. Long live the Golden Age! I remember it because I was there and I still live in the Golden Age til this very day! I have constructed a barrier field where storyless moe stuff get burned! They tried to creep in through the various channels of the interwebs but they will most certainly fail!

    However, what I do sense from the invasion army of senseless moe is far more vicious. You see, without a story, they can skip the script writer and just outsource the whole damn production to 3rd world country in the name of cost reduction!

    The problem with meaningless moe as we see in these days and age is poisonous because it is an exploit on the audiences' desire to feel superior, just like those so call reality show, it requires no story and provide cheap entertainment.

    Moe is just a spice and in no circumstances shall it ever be served as a main dish. Give me my story back.

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  15. That manwhich looked kind of thin, but it still made me hungry.

    Ever try pasta, but with hot sauce instead of tomoato sauce? It's actually pretty damn good....God knows how this post made me actually think of food.

    Keep fighting the good fight.

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  16. Great! Great post! It really made my day. Though, I can't go along with the content ^^ Still, I hope you will keep up the spirit to fight the moe-countering struggle. Good luck, my friend. Or should I say foe in this case? ^^

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  17. The manwich is so manly. ;)

    Well, I still dunno the existence of moe (ahahaha, is that good news to you?!), and I pretty much prefered classic things (golden age?).

    I bid you all the best in your fight. ;D

    PS. do u have facebook btw? if you don't, it's still ok. cause I wanna add ppl I know while I can access it, lol.

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  18. NomNomNomNomNom!! Hmmm MANwich

    Anyway Snark, I have a proposition to you. I have the very thing that will end the rein of moe, destroying it down to its very roots!!

    I present you, the D.A.M.B(Destroy,all,moe,button).

    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vx0Gu7pPdqo/SshFfO3dFtI/AAAAAAAACIw/qgHstCUNB_k/s1600-h/The_moe_apoc_button.JPG

    But this requires the lives of half of the most manliest man in the world(this involves you btw). So, will you be willing to sacrifice half of MAN, to turn the tides of war, or endure a long relentless battle againt moe?

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  19. Well, I've always like cute anime ^^; Still, I do like strong, adult female characters. I'm just not big on overly moe stuff (like Mio from K-ON) or complete fanservice. All in moderation ;)

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  20. Manvich make me strong!
    I am full of manvich, and I am coming for you!
    Go ahead and cry, baby! Cry some more!

    Okay edited quotes aside, we are in an era where moe takes a dominant force right now, and when this has become a preferred taste of the audience, studios and companies in return continue to make more of that to satisfy the audience and customers, hence making a cycle.

    Kaioshin Sama did mention how moe is taking a dominant too, and perhaps it's about to reach its very peak. Which means decline can be imminant with new stuff coming back in to mainstream. Back then it's the robots, and now moe. I wonder what era we will be in next.

    Just hang it in there a bit longer, mate. Just like resistance forces, you know a revolution is ripe to break out when the time is right.

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  21. Just don't take out genuinely pure series like Cardcaptor Sakura in your crusade ;)

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  22. Your ideas intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Lol@D.A.M.B!

    Voted for Reviews/Impressions in the poll. Cause all your reviews are epic!

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete